I'm still around
Assalamu alaikum. So much has been going on....we've come to a truce of sorts. It's not all rosy and wonderful, it's civil. I'm in a spin cycle here and the girls are in their mid term exams. Not much talking has been done.........but I basically asked him for a divorce. We managed to get by that, and are in this sort of grey period.......subhanAllah.
Forgive me for not being around sooner. I have a great support system of a couple of sisters, who are regularly keeping in contact with me, and am standing up pretty well. I'm not that weeping bundle of goo that I used to be way back when.
The one thing I can say....I don't see any solution to any of this....any time soon. It would be silly of me to expect one, to expect him to do anything for me at this point.......
posted by Safa at 10:45 PM
6 Comments:
Asalamalaykom Habibti,
Thanks for the update! We all love and care for you. May your support be strong as strong your coffee ;)
Think of the labryinth; the maze. You worked your way into it. Now, to work your way out will take the equal amount of time. Remember this, ok? Swim out/swim back. Gain weight/loose weight. It's got to balance. If you remember how it will take as long to get untangled as it took to get tangeled, then your expectations will change into something mangeable and real.
May Allah make it easy on ALL of you :)
12:51 AM
Subhanallah... i feel so worried about you.
3:18 AM
Oh dear. I know this is a very hard place to be and I am praying for you, dear Safa. I'm here to chat any time you want.
Love you,
PM
3:20 AM
Lots of love and prayers your way. You are in my thoughs. Love, Sobia
11:58 AM
Stay strong, sweety. Have been keepin you and yours in my dua. Love you. Ma salaama
1:17 PM
Sister Safa,
Think of the girls... He is their father, they need him. Probably he's not helping at all to find a solution, but maybe you can... maybe by being so loving and affectionate, he'd prefer you and leave her eventually, since he's not fair in the first place so he goes more with the one he's at rest with.
I know it's hard hiding your pain, It'll need nights of Kiyam layl (praying at night before fajr) to strengthen you for the mornings... He has not done it the Islamic way (giving you the choice before marrying another wife), then that indicates that he goes after his desires, bring all his desires to your home... It'll take time. I know 2 similar situations. The men went back to their first wife in the end, but the women struggled to swallow everything, and we prayed for them... and the children...may Allah bless them
To all readers, I am not against Plygyny girls, but I AM against any Egyptian man marrying another wife, because of over 90% of cases, they are not islamic, never fair, and it's a weary battly for the woman. Safa, hold on... think of the little ones, the baby on the way, think of who he was before going off to marry... Only YOU can get him back...
Praying for you dear sister... I have SEEN your pain in 2 other women... and ask Allah to be by your family's side... and direct your husband to the right path inshAllah.
7:39 PM
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