I've been sick since Friday night. Everything hurts, my bones hurt. I was so cold and the girls covered me with a duvet and one of those velour blankets. But I was still shivering. I spent most of Saturday in bed, in and out of sleep. The girls kept putting cold compresses on my forehead, even my 3 yr old. My whole body just ached. My hubby called and talked to me. He is worried that I will "welcome" this sickness as an escape. Hmmmmmmmm......maybe 5 mos ago, but now? Too late. He's telling me to be strong, not let it overtake me........I don't know, I just found it slightly humourous. I'm sick, not dying.

This morning I woke up and my throat is hurting, but deep inside, not in the regular place, you know what I mean. The headache is gone. Funny thing is that I ran out of prozac so I missed one dose. I almost wonder if that had something to do with it, because you are supposed to go off it gradually. I got another box, so I'm good for another 20 days. I'm wondering if I should start getting off it? How do you decide something like that?

I did manage to ask my hubby one thing, which is if he'll be coming after the kids finish their exams. He answered, "Yes, wouldn't that be better?" So that means he'll be coming after June 7th. I'm still sort of worried that he's putting me off and not coming. I'm thinking of what I want to know and what I need to ask. I'll be writing it down, thanks Umm Abdurahman. I don't think it'll be too much, you know men...after the first few minutes all they hear is blah blah blah anyways. # 1 on my list tho, he's saying that he'll stay 3 weeks, and then have to go back to Cda for 2 weeks and then he'll be back again.......I wanna go back with him for those 2 weeks. I know I mentioned that before. Now how to push it on him??? I'm not saying a word about it right now, I'll wait till he's here. That way he doesn't have time to do away with certain things in the house. I'm dying to get a look at credit card statements, phone bills...etc etc. I know suspicion is bad. And maybe whatever I'd find doesnt' make any difference now. But I want to know the extent of everything. I've been lied to so much and he isn't forthcoming with the truth. It's like pulling teeth. I'm sure you'll all tell me not to bother with that.....but I really want to. I mean, he was married for an entire year to the Canadian woman, and I didn't know. How on earth was he giving me my rights? Of course that's between him and Allah, but I wonder as to how that is considered halal? I mean, islamically you can marry another woman without the 1st wife's permission, but are you supposed to keep it hidden? That doesn't seem right. Anyways.....I still don't feel well. I've gotten up from the computer twice while writing this post. I gotta go lie down.