Oh crappy day....
Hubby called and said that they are trying really hard to book the tickets....reservations have been made with two airlines, waiting for confirmation....for about August 10th......returning Sept 10th.....
So we chit chatted a bit......and then I couldn't help myself....I told him..."I wanna ask you something, but I don't want you to get defensive, ok??" And he's like...okay go ahead....
So I says, "what happened about the lipstick shirt?"
Silence for a second...and then he says.....that she says that she wouldn't do anything so petty......and accuses me of doing it. That she loves me and would never hurt me like that....blah blah blah.
So then it's my turn for silence....so then after a moment I says...
"So don't you wanna get mad at me?" And he's like, 'Why would I wanna do that?'
I says, "well, the lipstick didn't just jump onto ur shirt...and if she's saying she didn't do it, then that leaves me.....so u should start freaking, right?"
And he's like..."I'm not accusing you of anything.." Okay, then....so what are you going to do about it???
Listen to his answer,
"I'm going to leave it to Allah....whoever did it Allah will punish them".
Silence.
I feel like crap. I didn't do it....wouldn't do something like that....he's been my husband for 15 yrs and I have no need to send trophies to her, as much as I don't like my situation.
I start to cry softly.
And then I quietly tell hubby, "you know me....if I did something like that, I would tell you...even if it was wrong. When I deleted a missed call on your cell phone from her (I regretted it instantly), and you asked me...I told you that I did it. And asked you to forgive me. I did not put lipstick and perfume on the shirt."
"I believe you", he says.
Why don't I feel any better?
posted by Safa at 11:20 AM
7 Comments:
Sweet, Sweet Safa,
I think you should feel better because you have your answer. He said he believed you. You didn't belabor the point by pointing out that means he doesn't believe her but that is essentially what I think he means. This is a woman he doesn't know that well -- certainly not as well as he knows you. Don't you think he is smart enough to figure that she is lying when she said she didn't do it? Just don't forget he is a man and cannot stand to have his face rubbed in the problems of his own making. Nor can he stand to admit to you that she has lied. My own husband's other wife became a perfect woman after years of a miserable marriage. All it took was my appearance on the scene to turn her into evrything he ever wanted in a wife ;-))) LOL!
I would try to let it drop now, dear, and feel good that you still have his trust, al hamdulillah.
Salaam Alaikum,
PM
12:58 PM
Masha-Allah, PM put it perfectly, But I think I understand why it is that you don't feel better,though Because your tired of the nonsense and you would like to be able to have peace of mind when it comes to your marriage and keeping someone around who brings fitnah is not going to bring that peace of mind. Insha-Allah he'll get it before it's to late.
As-salaamu alaykum
1:37 PM
my dearest safa, ya habeebtee, please don't cry. did i tell you that i figured out toronto is 6 1/2 hours from me. i think i'm 4 1/2 hours from the grand canyon border between canada and the US and then it's another two hours to toronto. maybe we can meet insha'Allah. cheer up please. pretty pleeaasse...
2:01 PM
I was thinking to call him back and tell him I'm really not satisfied with his way of dealing with things......that "leaving it to Allah"...isn't going to make it any better for me....for him it would, cuz he then chooses not to do anything. But after reading your comments...I'll leave it alone......sitting down at the computer again started me crying. But I do see one thing...he said, I believe you.
I kind of figured out what hurts me....is that all the people in his family are hurting me cuz of this woman....he is hurting me cuz of this woman...and now....she is hurting me. Someone I don't even know.......why has hubby left me open for all of that? I can't take more pain than this........
2:11 PM
Asalaamu alaikum,
I am not ignoring you......I love you and if you want I can try and call you sometime...I am just spacey.....I just forget.....I am sorry....do you still love me?
6:34 PM
ur my best buddy, Ummabdur-rahman.....I know u ain't ignoring me......I just feel crappy......make dua that my tickets get confirmed......
10:08 PM
Insha'Allah I will...I agree with not telling the kids yet because if things, May Allah forbid, fall through then at least you will not have to explain why you are not going to them.
2:15 AM
Post a Comment
<< Home