WARNING: Long post
It's official....we are now living in Barrie! YAY!! Barrie is 115 KM north of Mississauga.....where we used to live. (145 KM from Hamilton where the ex sometimes is)
I tried calling the ex 2 weeks before we moved to inform him. Since I know he is in Egypt, I knew the call wouldn't be answered. But it does say on my court papers that I have to let him know of our whereabouts. So I left a message for him to call me back....which he didn't. I'm thinking of sending him a letter to the address on our court papers....(which I also know is not where he is living....) I think its better to send it, just to cover my back. I'll take pictures of the letter, or maybe even a video of me putting it in the mail box. Just in case, you know?
I expect that if he does return for the court hearing on the 19th...that he may play up some show that his kids were gone and he had no idea where they could be. And I suppose in the same vein, I can also say...well I tried calling you for the last month, but you never answer your cell phone...*blink innocently......you haven't been coming to get the kids either.....*blink *blink.
Anyways.....about the moving....
Don't you love moving horror stories? But mine starts out pretty good actually.....I'm renting the truck from UHaul....and for a one way move, the cost will be $238 including a dolly with a maximum of 113 kms. Sounds great so I book it for Saturday. Then Friday night before the move, I get a call from UHAUL....there's a small problem. I booked for a one way move, but they really need the truck back for Monday morning.....so the general manager says he wants to make me a deal.....he'll give me unlimited KM's and bring the price down to $150 if I'll bring the truck back. Sounds great!!
I show up on Saturday morning to pick up the truck and oh no! The truck isn't there....the people who had it from the night before still haven't returned it.....can I wait until 3 pm? No I cant......and finally they decide to give me one of the standby trucks.....and for my trouble....they knock off another $30. Nice!
I get back to the house with the big 26 foot truck...yep, I'm more than a little nervous driving it....but I'm doing all right. We start loading immediately and are in for a big surprise......we are out of room, and we still have a lot of stuff. Looks like I'm making two trips. (it's like a move from hell!) Now if I was paying for my KM's.....it is .69 cents X 115 KM.....you do the math.
We unloaded in Barrie and I'm dead....but I rest for an hour.....and then we are on the road again.....back to Mississauga......loading again.....sigh.......and then finally at 1 am......on the road back to Barrie. Did I mention that it was the G20 summit in Toronto? Yeah....so we had to take the toll highway going to Barrie each time.
Now something scary happened at about 2 am.....we are 2 cutoffs until I get off the highway....I have my brother and Cleo in the truck with me......and suddenly, I fell asleep. I could feel it coming, but I was fighting it. Good thing is....I only swerved off the road and caught myself when I was already half on the shoulder...... The kids thought I was joking around.....and then the truck got all serious when I said I fell asleep.
Finally made it back to Barrie.....we left the things in the truck and then went inside and literally crashed wherever you could find a spot. We were dead beat tired.
Sunday I drove the truck back......took Sjon and my brother Dakota........left Dakota at his house in Mississauga..........and stopped at our egyptian friends house for coffee......then back to barrie again.
There was some drama with the moving....surprisingly with Cleo.....who remarked to me....I feel like we are leaving Egypt all over again. That sort of smacked me like a brick wall.....and I could see where she was coming from. Sigh.
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So the good thing about Barrie is that it's more of a family city. It's in the north....so the winters are a bit longer......but so much goes on here. They've got festivals all the time.....we are walking distance from the beach.....the people here are more laid back, friendly. There are a bunch of programs and services here to help with low income families.....and did I say JOB OPPORTUNITIES? Last night I sat up looking at what is available at Georgian College......I need to make an appt soon to go and talk about the fall programs........I'm so tempted to start.
Oh how I want to.........
posted by Safa at 7:05 AM
8 Comments:
Send the ex your notification of new address by certified mail. That way you have proof that it WAS sent!
If you use your cell to call keep a printout of you phone usage......the one that details the numbers you called so that he can't say you never called.
Congrats on the new home! Tell Cleo to hang in there. Changes are always hard but she will settle into her new home.
1:41 AM
I agree with Cindi, Cleo will eventually settle down. She is the oldest and has gone through more than the youngest ones, so she is taking it worst than the rest. I'm sure she will be fine :-)
Do we get to see pics of the nice house? :-D
4:21 AM
if you really want to "cover your back" just try to notify him in earnest in egypt. if you don't, he may go to court and say that he had no idea where his kids were. then u'll show all ur 'proof' of having tried to contact him in CA. then he'll counter that the kids knew he was in egypt therefore u knew as well. and honestly, if i were a judge, i'd get really annoyed at you and him b/c it would seem like u were both playing games and trying to manipulate the situation. i say take the higher road and notify him for real. but that's just my 2 cents...
8:18 PM
Congrats on the move - sounds like a 'typical' do it yourself move - they always seem to be a comedy of errors - but thank goodness you did not have to pay for mileage.
And when you send the letter to him informing him of your move - send it double registered - this means he has to sign for it and you get proof that he did or did not sign for it - and as well you have proof that you did in fact mail him the letter to the address he provided in the court papers.
I think I would also take the high road and figure out some way of 'contacting' him in Egypt to let him know you have moved - then you have all bases covered when/if you do end up in court again if he shows. No sense in playing his 'silly games'. You are a much better person than that.
8:38 AM
Yup, definitely send a certified letter. I'm not sure what it is in Canada, but here in the US, we just pay an extra $1 or 2 to have a little "certified" sticker stuck on the letter. You get a receipt back that you can use to track the letter, and can be used as legal proof in court that you did send the letter and that it was received.
11:50 AM
He can refuse to sign for certified mail (or at least we can in the US), but then you would get it back showing that you did send it. It would still be service. I'd say do that, and take your phone record, showing that you called and left messages.
I'm glad you got all moved. Was the truck you used larger than the one you had rented?
6:04 PM
I have heard that moving is ranked up there with divorce as one of the most traumatic life experiences. There's almost always a falling-out of some sort, so consider yourself blessed. :) Looking forward to seeing photos of life in Barrie.
10:38 PM
Everyone said exactly what I was going to abt the certified mail--and u getting a receipt, AND abt contacting him in Egypt and using phone bills and texts, etc as proof. We all seem to want u to cover ur butt so the EX has NO leg to stand on when he starts his inevitable BS. Ah Safa, I have some moving horror stories myself! I have done that so many times, including from Egypt more than once. Life can be so tiring at times, but when u are as old as I am and you look back on these years of struggle, you will be so happy that you all did it as a family together. Sweet memories are made sometimes from the most bitter of struggles. Love and hugs to you!
8:47 PM
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