Ring around the rosy....

Lets close our eyes and dream together today. I wish you had that sort of program on your computer where you could just rest your head and close your eyes, and hear me reading this post. It would be like a story, and you could indulge yourself in my words, lose yourself in the sound of my voice. Wouldn't that be nice? So lets begin.....


~~~~~Ring around the Rosy~~~~~

Do you all remember that childhood game that we would play?


Ring around the rosy? How we'd hold hands with all our friends, and sing together in unision.....faces raised to the sky....and then laughing....fall down in a tumble of limbs? I remember trying my best to fall on top of the person next to me......to somehow get a foot to the head on my other side.....have you ever played this at the top of a hill? Oh I have. My friends and I would collapse in laughter, and try to pretend that we were rolling uncontrollably down the hill....only to tredge back up again and raise our faces...once again....to the sky.







Oh the joy of simple games.

Of companionship.


Of laughter.







So fast forward now...what? 25 yrs? Oh my. Well yes.....fast forward that and you know what I realized JUST this morning? I'm still playing ring around the rosy. But it's like the Goth Version....lol....where all is black....and we are chanting the words....and our running around has reached a feverish pitch....and somehow the momentum of the game has us all holding tighter....clenching our fingers....clenching our jaws.....and no matter how hard I try....I can't seem to break free. It's the spinning momentum that's keeping me up. I know that if I should find the strength to break free from that torturous grasp that I will fall.....and this time....I'm not playing from the top of any hill.......I'm on a level that even mountains envy. Can u imagine this with me?


~~~~~a pocket full of posies~~~~~


But never mind my Goth Version of a childrens' game......
...lets go back to the love and laughter......
.......ohhhh....can you feel it?
Turn your face towards the sun, and let the brightness seep into your skin.......feel that joyful abandon......the promise of laughter hangs around you as you look into the expectant faces of your friends...your supporters. For a little while, they will be standing strong beside you....holding your hands tight.....what an idea. We being the sing song together.....our voices raised....our spirits raise.....baited breath waiting for the key phrase that begins our release......

I've played this with my children. And watched them tumble. But with a mothers love...I know I held their hands too hard. How can a mother willingly let go, knowing her child will fall? And then, I'd laugh with abandon as my kids would argue on who would get to hold my hands. Oh, that Allah only created a mother with 2 hands, yet gave her the ability to have many children.....I wish I had hands enough for all of them. But alas, I don't....and the children have to satisfy themselves with taking turns. We play once, we play twice.....then the kids become upset with me.


"Mama! You are supposed to fall all the way on the ground and roll around a bit....going down on one knee doesn't count!"


How do you plead old age? How do you comfortably roll around in the park wearing hijab and gilbab? LOL...children are precious. So the game takes on a new level with them.....now it's not about rolling and tumbling...it's about how to make Mama fall over.....so when we get to the last phrase...the girls rush me....my arms are open and waiting....and try their hardest to push me over. Who wins? Oh they do.....they are 4 children and determined.....and I am just one. But you know I'm laughing and smiling...(and now rolling on the ground...LOL).....and just maybe...just maybe....I didn't offer that much resistance. wink.wink.


~~~~~hush-a hush-a~~~~~

So back to the Goth.....well.....like I said...I'm still playing this one. It's not as fun, not as exhilarating....and I daresay....NOT as rewarding. (having your arms full of your own laughing children is a hard number to beat!) And this time around....I'm desperately trying to work my fingers out of the grasp....even tho I know it'll make me fall. The spinning has gotten me dizzy...and although I'm trying to maintain focus....I find myself caught up in the whirlwind. I try to imagine myself as a whirling dervish and embrace the vertigo. HAHA....oh my....I've become desperate friends. Sigh. But here's a thought.....you know what I realized?


I am not afraid of falling.


SubhanAllah. I wasn't expecting that.....but I look at the concept of my fall as the signal to get up and play again! Oh sure, I'll have limbs all over the place and maybe even a foot to the head....but the game doesn't stop there......and if for every game of Goth Ring around the Rosy I play, I get 20 games of the real deal.....so what?


I see it coming now. The fall. And recognize it.....I use that as my focus point, so that I can even conquer the dizziness....and it's working. I'm not thinking of the end of this game....I'm thinking of the beginning of the next one.....I'm picturing my face to the sun....I'm feeling the warmth.....can you feel it with me? Can you?


~~~~~ W E A L L F A L L D O W N !!~~~~~

Quick!

I dust myself off.....and reach out my hand....take it friends....come play with me......hold my hand and lets spin around.....lets not ponder over our falls....lets not get caught up in the spinning whirlwind......
I just want to play...


to have fun...

To laugh...

and live life...


What's more precious than that?

Oh, the joy of simple games.